Funniest Things Our Kids Have Said (Part 2)
Thursday
Feb 25, 2010
3 year old son, buck-naked, “Mom, who do I look like, God or Jesus?”
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My son was around 5 and at a hockey game went to get some stick on tatoo’s. When he came back he said the lady at the counter was mad because she said he needed to buy them. I said Oh I should have given you some money. He then said no there was a sign there that said 3 for a dollar and I only wanted two!
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whilst building blocks with my 3 year old – he went off to his room…’where are you going’? i asked. His reply… “I’m just going to get my imagination”
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When my then three year old farted, I said “what do you say?” She said, “you better get outta here.”
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My daughter aged 4 asked how babies grow in the tummy. I said “Its like a tiny seed that grows” She replied “OH and can you see the child’s face on the seed packet before you choose”
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My two year old daughter who was playing with a toy screw driver shouted- ‘Look Mummy, I’m screwing the driver!’
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my 5 year old daughter was brushing my long hair from behind and said ” oh mommy, you look so beautiful without your face!”
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“Jack, do you need to go potty?”
No, Dad.
“Then Why are you holding yourself?
My penis just wants me to.
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When looking at the dog next door i said to two year old i think its a boy. She looked at it and said i think its a dog!
Comments
Jennifer
February 25th, 2010 at 4:04 pm
My 4 year old loves that show max and ruby and when we went to Rubys diner one night she told grandma that “she went to max and rubys and ate chicken hands” (instead of fingers)
Danielle
February 25th, 2010 at 4:14 pm
A few days after my daughter was born my 2 year old son came into the room while I was breastfeeding and asked me what I was doing. When I told him I was feeding the baby he shrugged his shoulders and asked ‘Feeding her breakfast?’ and I said ‘Yup that’s right!’ to which he asked still shrugging ‘You have bagels in your boobies?’ Needless to say, he had to wait a few minutes for his answer…….I was laughing way to hard to talk
)
Julie C
February 25th, 2010 at 4:16 pm
My 4 year old son was on the pot one day (naked, as usual) while I was in the next room. He says to me, “Mommy, wanna buy a cock?” “A what?!”, I replied, not sure I was hearing him correctly. “A cock, it’s a pretend flower made out of toilet paper and it’s only a dollar.”
jenn
February 25th, 2010 at 4:19 pm
when my son was two, he came in the kitchen and said ” mom those sure are BIG butt cakes” I thought he was talking about MY but..instead, it was the cupcakes I was making-he couldnt say cupcake yet!
Tracy B
February 25th, 2010 at 4:22 pm
My family and I were eating out for dinner and my children were acting out. I asked my then 5 year old daughter where her manners were and she seriously replied, ” I think I left them at home in a box in my closet.”
Jan
February 25th, 2010 at 4:41 pm
When my oldest son was 4 he came up and hugged me. then he started to squish my “cheeks” with both hands and said “Mommy, i love your bum because it’s so big and squishy”
Julie
February 25th, 2010 at 4:53 pm
My 3 year old when asked where she came from “I broke out of plastic!”
Ingrid
February 25th, 2010 at 5:08 pm
When my son was around 3, he was looking forward to his dessert but still had a few peas to finish first, he said “Mommy can finish my peas, and I get dessert – that’s “cooperation”!”…
Dita
February 25th, 2010 at 5:17 pm
When my daughter was 2 yrs old and potty training, we had to drop off our car at the mechanic. On our way home that morning she says “Mommy, I have to go pee”. We were 5 minutes from home so I asked her “can you hold it until we get home?”. Her response was “no, my hands are full”.
Kristi
February 25th, 2010 at 5:38 pm
When my son was 3 I was making grilled cheese sandwiches for him, which was his favorite. I couldn’t figure out why he kept looking at it and crying. Finally I asked him what was wrong and he said I don’t want GIRL cheese sandwiches I want boy cheese sandwiches.
Lynn
February 25th, 2010 at 5:55 pm
I knew it was time to get a haircut and new perm when my cherub said “Mommy, you have pretty hair…like a witch!” Thanks, Precious…
Karie
February 25th, 2010 at 5:55 pm
Just something cute that melts everyones hearts when I tell it. We live in a highly wooded area, and my youngest daughter (she was 2 1/2 at the time) & I were outside. She was playing near the swingset & I was sitting on the hill reading the newspaper. I thought I heard some rustling of the leaves from the woods (which is located right behind the swingset). As I lower the paper I see 3 baby deer within 5 feet of my daughter… so I tell her to turn around quietly (and so she whips around not quietly I might add), and look to see the suprise behind her… She stops in her tracks and says look Mommy horsey’s:o) They were not scared of her at all…wish I would have had my camera…it was a beautiful scene:o)
Lucy
February 25th, 2010 at 6:17 pm
My son was about 7 when I asked him to please call Daddy because I needed to speak to him, my son came back and said Daddy is talking to Congress. I asked why would you say he’s talking to Congress, he said because he’s on phone and they said that he has to wait for the next available “REPRESENTATIVE”. (Daddy was on the phone waiting for the next available customer service rep)
kelly menke
February 25th, 2010 at 7:40 pm
When my son was four years old, he walked in on me in the bathroom. He asked me why I had hair down there. I told him to ask his dad. Without missing a beat, my husband said “To keep things warm”.
Sherry Pope
February 25th, 2010 at 9:14 pm
My Grandson who is almost 3 spent the night away from home for the first time. He asked, what do you have on your feet? I answered, panty hose. Well actually they are called knee hi’s. Oh, he said. A few minutes later I climbed into bed and he asked, Grandma do you still have your hiney hose on?
Debbie
February 25th, 2010 at 9:41 pm
When my boys were younger they were trying to collect all of the different quarters from the 50 states with their grandpa. My youngest son was only three and I was impressed with how quickly he was learning all of the states from the new hobby they had started. One morning, while driving him to day care, he picked up a quarter from my change collection in the car and asked,”Mommy, which state is this?” I replied that I couldn’t look right then because I was driving. He then said, very proud of himself, “I know! It’s New Hampster!”
Irma K
February 25th, 2010 at 11:12 pm
Our daycare was down a country road and we unfortunatley would see animals on the side of the road, dead quite often. My 4 year old son one morning asked me, “Mommy, why do the possums come to the road to die?”
Darlene
March 3rd, 2010 at 12:22 pm
When our daughter was four we moved from Ontario to Sasktachewan. When Gramma asked where she was moving to she told her Gramma she was moving to Vagina! LOL
hiedi
March 7th, 2010 at 4:10 am
my 3 year old asks me yesterday “mummy, what are those cracks in your face?”
Kelly
March 8th, 2010 at 11:07 am
We had elected to keep the gender of our second child secret from the family. When our older son ( 4) was brought to the hospital to meet his new sibling he announced, ” Don’t tell me what it is. Just tell me this…. does it have a penis?” The nurses were rolling!
katie
March 14th, 2010 at 3:28 pm
while my four year old was pushing her play shopping cart around she said “when I get to marry, I will say husband your pickin’ ALL that up! ” I laughed so much , she cracks me up at some of the things she will say.
katie
March 14th, 2010 at 3:34 pm
I was so proud of myself when I finally grew my nails out after chewing them all my life, they were nice and long and wern’t cracking I took care of them and painted them …..I loved them….untill …..my daughter one day was sucking her thumb sitting on my lap and she was picking at my nail and she pulled her thumb out of her mouth and said “Mommy? your nails look like witch nails”
katie
March 14th, 2010 at 3:40 pm
I was shopping one day at a thrift shop I go to often so the women in there knew me and my daughter but we never got formally introduced untill one day we walked in and they said hi to me and my daughter who was 2 in a half at the time. And this one little old lady who worked there bent down and asked “whats your name?” and my daughters reply was ” dee-da-lee crack!” (her name is Audrey)
Renée
March 17th, 2010 at 8:44 am
My three year old daughter, Jasmine and I were getting ready to head out the door and I told her she should pee before we go. She said, “but I don’t have any pee in my bum”
Kristen
March 28th, 2010 at 12:58 am
While watching the Olympics I asked my 4 year old daughter what her favourite event was. She replied that she liked the “peach skating” the best. Somewhat puzzled (but knowing her) I asked, ‘Do you mean the pairs skating”? “Oh right, the PEARS skating!” she said.
Lisa Cosmillo
April 15th, 2010 at 4:20 pm
My 8-year-old daughter and I were looking in the mirror and brushing our hair, when she compared our similar looks, “except she said, you have all those wrinkles.” I told her that if she lived a happy life as I had, she would have smile lines too. She solemnly informed me, “Gosh, I hope not!”
KIM
April 16th, 2010 at 12:09 am
Noah was telling Ari about a scene from a tv show she missed, he then said “ Here watch me and I will do a re-incarnation for you!”( He meant to say re-enactment )…Almost as funny as the time he said I need a paedophile….he meant to say pedicure!!