View from the Empty Nest: What We All Wish We Could Ask That Doctor at the Cocktail Party

1.) I have been having these pains behind my right eye when I watch more than three hours of HGTV  at one sitting. Could this be a tumor? Would eye drops help? 2.) Do you watch Grey’s Anatomy? Don’t you just love it? 3.) Whenever I blow my nose, my ears itch. Is this serious? And can people drown using Neti Pots? 4.) How do you know if you have hemorrhoids? 5.) I get backaches … [Read more...]

View from the Empty Nest: The Status Quo

I read an article on the Huffington Post, I think, about being a grandparent. The woman who wrote it said that she has no real desire to be one. I guess she thought that this was very controversial and would cause all kinds of furious comments, thus making her viral and famous. Of course, I may just be a bit contentious myself today. Because here is the thing: of course you don’t … [Read more...]

Mommy in the Raw: Work Life Balance is a Ridiculous Term

This week, my sister had a baby, my family was kicked out of our apartment so the landlord could deal with our flooded bedrooms/moldy walls, and I discovered I’m plum out of vacation/sick/personal days at work because I stupidly took a two week vacation before all this cray-cray started. This is not an issue of work-life balance or work-life fit.  I’m not sitting here contemplating how to … [Read more...]

View from the Empty Nest: Dreams

I have recurring dreams. They are very strange. I guess some of them are common. I have looked some of them up on “dream analysis” web sites. What I have learned about myself isn’t pretty. But some of my readers might share these dream topics, and so I thought I would share my dreams and their meanings, in case you want to know yourself better. Something terrible has happened, and you need … [Read more...]

Yours, Mine & Theirs: Caution, Slippery When Wet

In my professional role as a sexual health educator, I'm perhaps most notoriously known for being a lubricant Nazi. I've been known to take women from protests of, "Girl, I don't need lube! I'm telling you, a river runs through it, if you know what I'm saying," to paranoid exclamations of, "My God... Everything I thought I knew has been a lie!" It's true. Every woman between the ages of 18 and … [Read more...]

View from the Empty Nest: Paris Awaits

People who have the courage to just stop what they are doing and start all over are heroic, in my opinion. Reinventing oneself is unbelievably courageous. Once most of us are on a path, living in a place, doing a job, and making a living, that is it—whether we are happy or not. So it was with great admiration that I watched the latest episode of House Hunters International. Wow. I had to … [Read more...]

Yours, Mine and Theirs: Pimp My Mom Ride

Dear Pimp My Mom Ride: You may have seen me driving around town. That 20-year-old SUV with “WASH ME” etched into the quarter-inch of dirt and caked mud (thanks, kids)? Yeah, that was me. Should any of my friends contact you to say my vehicle needs an overhaul (it does!), I’d appreciate it if you don’t let them know we’ve been in touch. I know loved ones always have suggestions as to … [Read more...]

Three in the Bed: Or, make that Four in the Bed.

I have often dedicated blog space to my immense fear of scorpions. If you aren't in the southwest you may find my concern odd—much the same way I don't understand your worry of driving through a snowstorm or fear that the winter season is now October through April. For those of us living sans-snow, our trade-off appears to be a willingness to live with a vile little creature with a horrible … [Read more...]

View from the Empty Nest: Facebook 101

Social media is an essential part of today’s “always in touch with everybody all the time” lifestyle! Who knows when you might want to take a picture of your lunch? And what would you do with it if it weren’t for Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter? I mean, the people in Australia may have never seen a tuna sandwich on rye. So since some of you may not know how to use social media … [Read more...]

Silicon Mom: Excess Baggage

As most of you know, I lost half my body weight between Dec. 2012 and Sept. 2013.  That left me with a lot of excess skin and two very very sad boobs.  Because of all the exercise I did, underneath that skin I was pretty fit, so my joke was I had the body of an extremely fit 80-year-old woman.  Joking aside, that extra skin really impacted my view of myself. In clothes, I looked amazing.  … [Read more...]