Dear newly pregnant person: I am getting adjusted to the thought that I am now qualified to enter the age group known as “grandparents.” I have mixed feelings about this. On the one hand, I cannot wait to hold your baby and give it right back as soon as he/she starts squalling. However, I am not really enthusiastic about being officially “old.” Because, of course, if you have a … [Read more...]
View from the Empty Nest: AN OPEN LETTER TO MY DAUGHTER (YAY, I AM HAVING A GRANDCHILD!)
Posted by on May 20, 2013
Yours, Mine and Theirs: Proud to be a Cougar (Mom)
Posted by on May 13, 2013
The book signing went well, with the exception of my girdle (what do they call them now -- body shapers?) nearly asphyxiating me. My editor stopped by to snap a few photos, commenting, "That's a lot of makeup and cleavage. Would you be more comfortable signing those out on the street corner?" Adopting the moniker "Sexy Vegan Mama" didn't seem like a bad idea in my early thirtysomethings, … [Read more...]
Silicon Mom: Insert Clever Title Here
Posted by on May 10, 2013
I should have turned this column in on Tuesday. I tried. Really, I did. I opened Word. I stared at the blank white page and the blinking cursor. Then someone was hungry, or there was a fight over how Princess told Caveman he didn’t know what mangos taste like, or something of equal significance, and I gave up. I don’t know if it’s the weather, the end of the school year, the … [Read more...]
Mommy in the Raw: Crap Mornings
Posted by on May 6, 2013
Crap mornings shoot my day. I wish my kids would just do what I ask them to do the first time I ask them to do it. I swear, that alone would procure a lifetime’s supply rainbows and butterflies. But after I’ve repeated the words “brush your teeth” 15 times, I’m bound to lose my shit. Really, deep down in their pure little five and seven year old hearts, they’re asking for … [Read more...]
Three in the Bed: Because Mars Day Doesn’t Sound Right…
Posted by on April 22, 2013
For days I was rolling around different topics for a post on Earth Day like, five reasons to recycle your wine bottles, or three clever ways to reuse them (hello Pinterest wine bottle crafts) or how to reduce the number of wine bottles in your home (conclusion, not possible). Then I came across an article about Stephen Hawking, the highly acclaimed physicist who wrote, A Brief History of Time. … [Read more...]
Uncorked in the ‘Burbs: Pinterest Hoard
Posted by on April 19, 2013
Like many a mom, I’m a Pinterest user. I have boards on top of boards: fun crafts to do with the kids, ideas for decorating, recipes (oh, so many, many recipes), makeup tips, inspirational sayings, books to read… it goes on and on and on. I have come to realize that I am a pinterest hoarder. I collect. And collect. And then collect some more. And then never do a darned thing … [Read more...]
View from the Empty Nest: I Don’t Mean to Complain
Posted by on April 15, 2013
They now call the time of life that I am in “mid-life.” All of us in this generation know that this term is optimistic, because if I am in mid-life right now, I will live to be 120. So although the term is hogwash, I will accept it with hope and gratitude. But being in “mid-life” has its drawbacks. Yes, I know—people look to all of us for wisdom and guidance. Some of us have long … [Read more...]
Silicon Mom: REWARD offered for Missing Weekends
Posted by on April 12, 2013
Remember weekends before kids? You know, when you maybe slept late or lazed around in pajamas sipping coffee and reading. Maybe you went out exploring, caught a (not animated) movie, or just got things done around the house. Maybe you sat on your sofa for a full 48 hours watching bad tv—it was YOUR weekend. You got to be productive (or not) as you saw fit. Yeah. Once you have kids, … [Read more...]
Yours, Mine and Theirs: Giving Birth… in Reverse
Posted by on April 8, 2013
Spring’s finally arrived. The sun is shining, I’ve turned on the AC, and my allergies are on overdrive. With a bit of apprehension, I busted out the spring wardrobe: sandals, t-shirts, flirty skirts, the works. This year, I wasn’t looking forward to putting away my bulky sweaters. When my dessert cookbook launched in January, I truly planned to lose those fifteen pounds I gained writing … [Read more...]
Second Act: Yes, I’m One of THOSE Parents.
Posted by on April 6, 2013
There are many things I’ve learned about myself since becoming a parent. I’ve learned how long I can go without showering. I’ve learned just how far I’m willing to lower my culinary standards. But the lesson that has surprised me the most? How much I love being a sports parent. I was not an athletic kid; in my youth you would have found me onstage with the other drama geeks, or … [Read more...]
